Suprise!
Everything’s changing. It’s the last quarter of my senior year and I’ve never felt so sure and unsure of my life as I do now... but I love it.
I haven’t written a Blog entry in a while because I haven’t really had anything to say that directly related to having a kidney disease. But then I realized that everything indirectly relates to PKD, and my life is interesting whether I have a disease or not.
I’ve recently coined the phrase, “I’m Lydia Dreyer. I do what I want.” It pretty much sums me up in a nutshell. I guess that isn’t so recent, but lately I’ve been saying it a lot more and living it. I went down to Butler and registered for my classes and I am oh so excited! It finally feels like everything is falling into place with school and life in general... to a certain extent.
The friendships are changing all over the place and that leaves me confused and exhilarated, but I love it. I’ve made a lot of new friends that I wish I would have met earlier in the year rather that when it’s ending, but I’m happy that they’re there nonetheless. I’ve filled out a lot of scholarship forms and have been asked a lot of similar questions, and am learning the expected answers... but I haven’t really been giving them. :)
The national fundraising letter went out that my dad and I co-wrote this year. It was neat; the foundation sent us a copy of the letter and a few sheets of our own without the letter and just the border with our picture. I love getting those little things from the PKD foundation that just remind me that I’m not the only one dealing with this and that there’s other people out there.
When I meet new people and establish friendships, there’s always the initial shock when I mention that I have a kidney disease. It’s usually some off hand joke that I make assuring them that they can drink after me because I don’t have any diseases. Then I laugh and am usually given a look if they don’t know about my pre-existing condition. (Ha Ha. Get it? They can share a drink with me because I don’t have any disease that they could catch--but I do have PKD, aka a disease)
PKD has become a part of me. A part of my life and a huge (semi-literally) part of my body. I still go through those times when I just get so pissed that I have it at all. I had one of those moments the other day. I was in the car on the way home from school, venting about something or another at the top of my lungs to a friend. It was a funny scene because I would yell and scream, then apologize about venting so much, and then do it some more, and then apologize and so on. My friend pointed out that I never really do this, so it was okay and whatnot. After that I decided to make the vent worth it and I screamed a few swear words followed by I hate my kidneys. I hate my life. (Which I don’t, it’s just fun to yell)
Don’t worry; I don’t hate my life or my kidneys. I get pretty pissed at both of those things, but I don’t hate them. PKD was a gift that I was given. Duh. It’s a gift to everyone else that has it. We can change the world, change the norm. Who says that kidney diseases aren’t cool? Our movement is helping to fight against genetic discrimination. Our stories inspire others to carry on in the rough times. We can be in medical testing programs, which is pretty sweet. PKD isn’t just a disease, it’s a community, it’s a lifestyle, and it’s a chance to make a difference in the world. Some gifts aren’t pretty at first, but it’s what you make of it that really counts. I’m being pro-active. And I’m living my life. I’m Lydia Dreyer. I do what I want.
I haven’t written a Blog entry in a while because I haven’t really had anything to say that directly related to having a kidney disease. But then I realized that everything indirectly relates to PKD, and my life is interesting whether I have a disease or not.
I’ve recently coined the phrase, “I’m Lydia Dreyer. I do what I want.” It pretty much sums me up in a nutshell. I guess that isn’t so recent, but lately I’ve been saying it a lot more and living it. I went down to Butler and registered for my classes and I am oh so excited! It finally feels like everything is falling into place with school and life in general... to a certain extent.
The friendships are changing all over the place and that leaves me confused and exhilarated, but I love it. I’ve made a lot of new friends that I wish I would have met earlier in the year rather that when it’s ending, but I’m happy that they’re there nonetheless. I’ve filled out a lot of scholarship forms and have been asked a lot of similar questions, and am learning the expected answers... but I haven’t really been giving them. :)
The national fundraising letter went out that my dad and I co-wrote this year. It was neat; the foundation sent us a copy of the letter and a few sheets of our own without the letter and just the border with our picture. I love getting those little things from the PKD foundation that just remind me that I’m not the only one dealing with this and that there’s other people out there.
When I meet new people and establish friendships, there’s always the initial shock when I mention that I have a kidney disease. It’s usually some off hand joke that I make assuring them that they can drink after me because I don’t have any diseases. Then I laugh and am usually given a look if they don’t know about my pre-existing condition. (Ha Ha. Get it? They can share a drink with me because I don’t have any disease that they could catch--but I do have PKD, aka a disease)
PKD has become a part of me. A part of my life and a huge (semi-literally) part of my body. I still go through those times when I just get so pissed that I have it at all. I had one of those moments the other day. I was in the car on the way home from school, venting about something or another at the top of my lungs to a friend. It was a funny scene because I would yell and scream, then apologize about venting so much, and then do it some more, and then apologize and so on. My friend pointed out that I never really do this, so it was okay and whatnot. After that I decided to make the vent worth it and I screamed a few swear words followed by I hate my kidneys. I hate my life. (Which I don’t, it’s just fun to yell)
Don’t worry; I don’t hate my life or my kidneys. I get pretty pissed at both of those things, but I don’t hate them. PKD was a gift that I was given. Duh. It’s a gift to everyone else that has it. We can change the world, change the norm. Who says that kidney diseases aren’t cool? Our movement is helping to fight against genetic discrimination. Our stories inspire others to carry on in the rough times. We can be in medical testing programs, which is pretty sweet. PKD isn’t just a disease, it’s a community, it’s a lifestyle, and it’s a chance to make a difference in the world. Some gifts aren’t pretty at first, but it’s what you make of it that really counts. I’m being pro-active. And I’m living my life. I’m Lydia Dreyer. I do what I want.
Comments
Well, thanks again, and may God bless you and your family.